“She died?”
The words were barely past his lips when pain immediately blossomed in Ryo’s brain, causing him to cry out at the sudden intensity of it.
Asuka…
Asuka was dead…
There was more to Asuka’s story than simple death and his mind knew it, even if he did not – could not – remember.
Ryo was dimly aware of someone calling his name and catching him before he crumpled to the floor, of strong, sure hands gently lowering him downward until he was sitting with his back against the cool glass of the balcony’s sliding door. He felt dizzy and disconnected, his head threatening to explode into a million jagged pieces.
“Pills,” he croaked, eyes squeezed shut against the piercing pain. “In the bathroom. Prescription bottle.”
Aya smoothed a hand down his face and placed a quick kiss on his forehead. “I’ll be right back.”
Ryo groaned when he was jostled, despite the fact that Aya was trying to be gentle. Dropping his chin, he shaded his closed eyes with one hand in effort to block out as much of the light as possible. None of the other episodes within in the past year had been anywhere near this debilitating.
Aya returned quickly from the bathroom with pills, a glass of water, and a wet cloth in hand. He paused only to turn off all the lights, for which Ryo was eternally grateful. Once Ryo had swallowed the medication, Aya laid the cold, damp cloth across his forehead and encouraged him to lie with his head in his lap.
Ryo didn’t know how long they stayed that way. He remembered Aya stroking his hair as they both waited for the medicine to do its job. Either he had dozed or passed out, because he came to feeling less like someone had been squeezing his brain with a vise and more like he’d been on an all-night drinking binge. He was also no longer in Aya’s lap, but on the bed. Alone. In the dark.
“Aya?” Ryo’s chest constricted, panic beginning to rise. “Aya!”
The sound of running water broke the silence followed soon by the bathroom door opening, revealing Aya.
“Ryo? Is something wrong?” He sounded more than a little worried.
“Um, yeah. Woke up and you weren’t here.”
Aya tugged the bathroom door nearly shut, allowing only a slip of light to filter into the room as he rejoined Ryo on the bed, looking apologetic. “Sorry, but nature had been calling for nearly an hour and I could no longer ignore it. It figures that you’d wake up the moment I left. Are you feeling any better?”
“If better means no longer feeling like my grey matter is about to bleed from my ears, then yeah, I am.”
Aya gave him a brief smile that faded far too quickly for Ryo’s liking. Turning away from him, he picked up an object from the nightstand. Only when he faced Ryo again did he recognize it as his prescription bottle. Ryo watched Aya study the bottle’s label, his brow furrowed in thought.
“These pills are for migraines, aren’t they?”
“Yes, they are. The headaches started last year when I began having the memory dreams nearly every night. I can use over-the-counter stuff for the small ones, but when they get too bad I have to take those. Only thing that makes the pain go away.”
Slowly, Ryo levered himself up into a sitting position and flopped against the pillows, his hand seeking out Aya’s and entwining their fingers.
“Memory dreams?” asked Aya, obviously curious. He glanced down at their joined hands and softly smiled.
“Or nightmares. Take your pick. I’d wake up with a horrible headache. Not every time, but often enough. Then I started getting the headaches during the day, mainly whenever I was trying to puzzle through something I remembered. Never been this bad before.”
“Oh. Sorry.” Aya was clearly blaming himself.
Ryo rolled slowly onto his side, facing Aya, keeping their held hands between them. He leaned forward – was pleased when Aya did the same – and met the redhead’s lips with his own, sharing a brief but achingly tender embrace.
“Hey,” Ryo whispered, brushing stray strands of red hair from Aya’s face. “You have nothing to be sorry for, Aya. I asked a question and you answered it. Now I know there was more to Asuka than I thought. More to her death. I’m not asking you to tell me right this second, because obviously my mind isn’t ready to deal with it. Hell, I’m obviously not ready to deal with it.”
Although true, his last comment was quite the understatement. Even now, just thinking of the other Asuka made Ryo’s brain threaten to revolt by swimming out his nostrils. He grimaced at the sharp jab of pain that accompanied the thought. No, he certainly was not ready to face that memory just yet.
He was aware of Aya staring at him, an expression of concern clear upon his face. Ryo managed a wan smile. “I’m fine, honest.”
“Yes, you certainly appear fine.” There was no mistaking the sarcasm in Aya’s tone. “You should get some sleep. What time do you have to meet your clients tomorrow?”
“Not until noon. We’re meeting for lunch first then a tour of the building. Speaking of which, I need to set the alarm. I don’t want to oversleep.”
“You don’t have to set the alarm, Ryo. I’ll wake up in plenty of time.”
“Early riser, are you?”
“Always,” replied Aya, smiling.
“And I’ve always enjoyed sleeping in, haven’t I?” Ryo rather liked the idea that some of his and Yohji’s habits had remained the same.
“Yes. Getting you out of bed was an exercise in the futile. But not to worry this time, I’ll make sure you get up in time for your meeting.”
Ryo laughed quietly, leaning in to give Aya another soft kiss. He sighed at the end of it, causing the man beside him to give him a questioning look.
“I wish I didn’t feel like shit. I had all kinds of good ideas about what we could do in bed together, and sleeping wasn’t supposed to happen for a while yet.”
Aya smiled again, tugging his hand free and brushing fingertips over Ryo’s face, comforting with his touch. “We have time. It’s more important for you to get rest and feel better. So come on then, let’s get into bed. Do you want me to turn off the bathroom light?”
Ryo quickly shook his head. “No. Leave it on, please.”
With a nod, Aya pushed back the covers and slid underneath, helping Ryo to do the same. As soon as they were settled, he held his arms out for the blond. Ryo went into them eagerly, laying his head on Aya’s chest and giving a contented murmur when the redhead began stroking his hair anew. It felt so good, so right to be here in Aya’s arms. It felt like he had finally come home.
Ryo fell asleep listening the soothing cadence of Aya’s heart.